 Hanukkah! Christmas! Kwanzaa! We are well into the Holiday season and the end of 2022 is indeed upon us. This is a time when Family and friends come together, share meals, take fun trips to enchanted places, and experience the incredible joy of love and giving. Sadly, there are some of us for whom the Holidays are far less than wonderful - filled with deep pain, anxiety, and depression. The pain and fear can come from many sources: long-festering and deep-seated emotional injuries that never had a chance to heal, general dysfunction, and probably the biggest one of all: death. Whatever feelings you have this season, even if they are not pleasant, I want you to practice MINDFULNESS and take 5 minutes today to connect with yourself and reflect on how you feel. Give yourself the space to focus on yourself. Let these questions both prompt you and guide you as you reflect: How are you feeling? Are you laughing? Are you smiling? Are you sad? Are you longing for something? Are you crying? Are you angry? What has happened in the last week that has contributed to how you feel? While your feelings should neither define nor control you, you will never be emotionally healthy until you are able and willing to acknowledge and address them. Being fully in touch with your feelings can help you gain insight about yourself, others, and the situations you find yourself in that can help you to navigate life's ups and downs while maintaining your peace. Now that you have this information, ask yourself this question: Are my spirit, soul, and body working in harmony and aligning with one another in equilibrium? If not, take a moment to do some belly breathing. Inhale for 4 seconds, hold your breath for 4 seconds, and exhale out of your mouth for 4 seconds. Do this four times. Check out the 2-minute video below for a demonstration of belly breathing: After you reflect, complete the process by doing one act of self-care. You'll be amazed how even doing a reflection exercise, doing belly breathing, and doing a simple gesture of self-care will help you feel more content.
My prayer for you is that you are at peace this Holiday season. I pray that you take a moment to practice self-awareness, connect with yourself, and show yourself some kindness by doing something that will help you be at equilibrium and have your spirit, soul, and body working in harmony. I would love to hear from you and see how this note made you feel. Click the link below to share with me.
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 Whether you're having a holiday brunch date with your Ride-or-Dies or enjoying a nice Holiday dinner with loved ones, this season will be filled with lots of emotions! Everyone, including you, wants to feel respected, happy, and loved during this time. The key to getting there is setting meaningful boundaries. The Importance of Boundaries Boundaries are the personal limits set within our relationships that allow for safe and appropriate connection with others AND the response when those limits are violated. Boundaries are determined by individual needs and preferences, so they vary from person to person and interaction to interaction depending on a number of factors including the level of trust and intimacy. Setting boundaries is the first step of self-care because it forces us to clearly define who we are and determine how valuable we are. It forces us to declare where our needs take precedence. Relationships with others can never be healthy if they require us to compromise ourselves. Boundaries warn us if we begin to compromise ourselves in spite of our feelings. If you are feeling uneasy with a person or angry toward a person, chances are you haven't set and kept clear boundaries to create an environment for maintaining a healthy relationship. Setting boundaries requires us to practice self-awareness. Once we are honest with ourselves about how we want people to treat us, we have to resolve not to accept any behaviors that step outside of our expectations. Once we make that determination, we begin respectful conversations with friends, partners, and colleagues about our feelings while letting them know what is acceptable. With shared understanding and agreement as the foundation, our relationships proceed on a much healthier and more fulfilling path. The last step to unlocking the power of setting boundaries is our responses when those boundaries are violated. Our boundaries lose all meaning if others can transgress them without consequence, so we make sure to have a plan in place to respond every time one of our boundaries is crossed. The exact nature of those consequences will vary depending on the offense and the relationship involved, but regardless every consequence is powerful because it is a statement that we matter and we demand our respect. We must be willing to allow those who are unwilling to meet that demand to live without the benefit of a relationship with us. Setting boundaries honors our needs and wants and provides us a framework for achieving the peaceful, affirming, and loving relationships we so richly deserve. Below is a video by Lisa Nichols on how to set and keep boundaries: I hope this email helps you live more authentically and give you the peace that you need to enjoy this week with your loved ones.
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